I was chatting to a chum of mine earlier today and they just happened to mention this community and do you know what I thought to myself? I thought, now there's a group that will be able to help me with my problem.
What problem I hear you ask? Surely Auntie Mary couldn't be having any problems, but I can assure you I do.
Two of them, to be precise. Both of them not much older than kittens, so they're all spitting and hackles and they decided to invade my back garden a few days ago. They've made such a mess. My begonias are all but done for and they've soiled my soil!
Now, I don't mind cats in general, but I've always been a dog person myself. If my father ever caught one in his prize strawberries, he used to sort them out with his old service revolver. Of course, I would never do something like that. For one thing, I don't have a gun.
I've tried everything I can think of to shoo them away. I've squirted water at them, swatted their noses with a newspaper (although that might be for labradors, thinking about it) and sprinkled my bedding plants with pepper. I'm sure my next door neighbour (Mr Thompson, nice man, suffers from gout) thinks I've gone quite mad.
I don't know where these kitten have come from, but they're a damn nuisance, if you'll pardon my language. Has anyone got any ideas how I can rid of them for once and for all?